Feeling Contemplative

Feeling contemplative lately and a little sad.  Christmas is coming, but it still seems like it should be July.  I haven't felt this way since Carmon died over 32 years ago.

On July 17th, I lost one of my best friends.  He didn't die but was stolen from me by a drug.  To say that I miss him would be an understatement.  I still pray for him every day, but I know he has his agency and even God won't interfere with that, no matter how much the people who love him pray.

Last Christmas was a wonderful season.  We were a family.  This year feels so empty.  Sometimes I can hardly catch my breath for the sorrow I feel.  I can't even talk to him.  I can't wish him a merry Christmas.  I can't give him a gift.  All I can do is cry and pray and cry some more and he doesn't even know it.  He thinks he was "just a project" to me.  He is so much more than that.  I love him because Christ loves him.

I am so sad that he doesn't feel either love.

It has been a long time since I have posted on my blog.  Last February, I was approached by a group of friends who were passionately concerned about their children's education.  As a result, my business partner and I founded a charter school.  George Washington Academy is a back-to-basics school where we still pledge allegiance to the flag, sing patriotic songs, teach handwriting, teach phonics and a sequential math that doesn't muddy the waters.  We have science, history, geography, and other social studies in an integrated, thematic format.  Our sixty-five children are happy and are learning.

I am the principal, school counselor, and I teach a class of fourteen fifth graders, five sixth graders, and two seventh graders.

Needless to say, by the end of the day, I am beyond tired.  After all, I am seventy years old!  The children wear me out yet fill my well so completely that I love each and every one of them.

I am truly blessed.